Limpers get no respect

By Bob Batz Senior Moments

August 8, 2014

Limpers get no respect and I’m one of them.

It’s that time of year when all sorts of organizations start making plans for spring and summer fund-raisers. Those events include everything from 5-K runs to long-distance walks to raise money for all sorts of charities.

But it seems like none of those events are designed specifically for limpers.

So, hey, what are we, huh? Chopped liver?

Sure, most of us limpers have a hitch or two in our git-alongs but so what?

Unfortunately for us, it seems like fund-raisers are ever designed for people who limp.

Like you never see a “5-K limp” or a “celebrity limp.”

Australia’s best-known song is titled Waltzing Matilda not Limping Matilda.

Those of us who have limped for awhile have over time developed our own special … um …limping styles.

Some of us walk carefully. Others have developed devil-may-care attitudes.

The thing we limpers have going for us is we are a brave bunch of guys and gals.

The only famous limper I can remember was Festus on the long-running TV series Gunsmoke but that was a long time ago. Or it seems like it, anyway.

For years after I developed a limp I was self-conscious so I tried to hide it from those who don’t limp.

But trying to hide a limp is a lot like trying to hide an ugly face. It’s harder than hell to do.

The good news is after I started limping I decided there are some advantages to walking all crooked-like.

If you limp people you don’t even know open doors for you at major department stores and if you also happen to have one of those handicapped cards to dangle on the rear-view mirror of your car you can park closer to the front doors of department stores than those who walk just fine.

Bob Batz is a long-time area writer, resident and guest columninst. Contact Bob at bbatz@woh.rr.com.