It is my goal, in this article, not to brag or sound like my wife and I have it all together. However on Aug. 22, 2018, my wife and I celebrate our 20 year wedding anniversary. Twenty years is quite an accomplishment. Has every moment of our 20 years been easy, no! We have had moments in our marriage that has been absolutely crazy and in all honesty, nuts.
We have had many people who have poured into our marriage so we could learn from them. Marriage is an adventure. To say the least. So, how does marriage work? These are not secrets, they are something that we all can and should do. Below is a list of the things we feel are the most major things that have helped us make our marriage work…. The greatest of them however is Love.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 – Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
There are so many things that help make our marriage work, the following are the three main things …
Our Relationship with God.
We both have a relationship with God. It comes first. As we each grow closer to Him, as you can hopefully see in the above drawing, the closer we get to each other. We work great as a team because we know where our first focus should be. When there is a task to complete or project to be done. We could do it individually, but when we work side by side, so much more is accomplished, then just the task at hand. We are building our relationship.
We did a bible study with other couples where we learned something very valuable. Men think like waffles, women think like spaghetti. Before you think I have lost my mind. The whole thought begins this is that men and women’s brains function differently. Men are very task oriented and we normally work better when we are focused on one thing at a time, like a waffle when you poor syrup on it, the individual boxes fill up and syrup does not cross over. Men think that way. We focus on one thing at a time, and do it well. It is hard for us to have multiple events happening together.
You ladies, are awesome, because you can have numerous things happening and keep them all straight in your thought process’, like a plate of spaghetti, everything all mixed up, but you have the ability to keep it all straight. When Kelli and I communicate we keep this information mindful. We communicate better now that when we did when we first got married. We have days and issues, but for marriage to work we have to consistently work on talking with each other, not at each other.
The saying teamwork makes the dream work, makes a lot of sense when it comes to marriage. When Kelli and I are working on any project. It doesn’t matter what it is, when we work together we accomplish so much more and always seems to go so much smoother. I cannot imagine trying to get through life without her by my side.
Marriage takes constant work, prayer, and a desire to stay committed.
Would you be interested in working on your commitment to our marriage? We are planning to start a Couples Small Group that will meet once a month. Message us through the Resurrection Crossing Facebook Page if you’re interested.
I pray that all our marriages are God designed and God honoring.
Pastor Joe Rhonemus is the pastor at Resurrection Crossing in Xenia, www.resurrectionxenia.com and is a guest columnist.